The truth shall set you free...

FOREWORD: Definitely not a winge, totally malice-free, mostly tongue-in-cheek thoughts on the inconsequential whilst gaining a little cathartic purging of musings..  ☺

Com·pet·i·tive/kəmˈpetətiv/

Adjective: 1. Of, relating to, or characterized by competition.

                2. Having or displaying a strong desire to be more 

                    successful than others.

Doesn't sound so bad does it? I could deal with that... oh, hang on... how about some synonyms?

Synonyms: aggressive, ambitious, antagonistic, at odds, ombative, competing, cut-throat, dog-eat-     dog, emulous, killer instinct, opposing, rival, streetwise, vying

Well, that's a little craptastic considering what I'm about to tell...

In the past week or so I've had a friend (probably one of my closest friends since shifting to the country life) tell me that she see's me as being quite competitive... followed with the phrase... "but it's okay, in a good way."

(So, now I'm hoping that "in a good way" means I can strike out most all those synonyms... maybe except streetwise - I'd take streetwise)

She honestly is the first person that I can recall actually telling me this (and I in turn told her this). I've never thought myself overly competitive - well, not to the point that it would be considered a word to describe my personality... so naturally I was surprised as I truly just don't see myself as being competitive. Thirty plus some years and I'm only just being told and learning of this now!

(And if you're reading this, my friend... I'm not losing sleep, I'm over  semi-over it... and I think I'm cool with it... I know I'll laugh about it with you over a bottle of red I'm sure - perhaps whilst challenging you to a cook-off... oooh bu*#er and shoot, that's just reminded me I have in the past mentioned the term 'cook-off'... in a competitive challenge to you - and to others present at the declaration time too! Have I been so ignorant to it? Blinded by my own competitiveness?)

In my quest of acceptance (or of proving this assessment wrong), sitting around having morning catch up coffee with this friend and another I asked the obvious... "Do I really come across as competitive?"

Answer: 

I don't believe there was one as they were too busy laughing their guts out at the fact I clearly didn't believe myself to be competitive. Is it that blatantly obvious that my ignorance is hilarious?

Hmm... fast forward a couple of hours.

Home with the hubs, I call out to him as he's rummaging through things in another room:

"Would you describe me as competitive?"

Answer:

An all too telling silence... (insert birds whistling/elevator music)... I swear, I could almost hear his sweat inducing panicked thoughts.... 

"What's the right answer? Is there a right answer? Does she want an answer? Surely it's rhetorical? Does she want the truth? Does she ever want the truth? How will she handle the cold hard facts? What SHOULD I say? What does she want me to say? I won't say anything. Will she ignore the non-answer? Will the silence make her believe she know's my answer? (which I will subtly note: It does!) "

Eventually, he braved a rather meek, "Well, you are a kind of determined... (followed by an even more sheepish) ...kind of in a stubborn way."

Hmm... I decided to press him more (plus imagining the new wave of flurried thoughts he'd be struck with kind of amused me), "Okay, so give me an example. What have I done that would demonstrate my being competitive?"

That, my friends was answered with the, I'm just going to crack a huff, tell her she's over analysing and beat a hasty retreat to my shed (aka man-cave).

Well, I guess maybe I am just a little competitive. Maybe I'd just never thought to consider myself so.

Is it so bad? I'd like to think not... mostly I think that if I were to consider myself competitive it would be in opposition to myself because I will easily admit that I don't mind setting myself challenges, bettering last efforts and wanting to do and be better (and yes, this does at times cause self-induced stress of varying proportions). 

The more I think of it the more examples that come to mind of my prior offending competitiveness, like:

How (in another life-time) when I was a police prosecutor one of the more regular criminal lawyers and I would keep a friendly running tally of our head-to-head bar table battles...

And yes, I loved - and miss at times - the argument, adrenaline and intensity that could be found in the courtroom (and the prep before when formulating the arguments, researching the legislation and case law and nothing beat the feeling of using that research to win... now I do pretty much the same - but at home and the topic of argument is toy equality and daily candy cut off times and the law of the household, which I must say has case law in a class of it's own)...

The time I did an evening time test (with an outdoor fitness group I trained with) for a run and failed to beat my last test time by only 8 seconds and how I was so cut that I got up at 5am the next morning to re-run the test with the morning session... just so I could better my time...

Oh... and shame on me... how if someone would get on the treadmill beside me at the gym I'd keep on running... harder... longer... lest they think me an unfit slug... tell me you do that too? Surely?  

Oh and woe me... the list is gaining momentum!

Okay. 

I'm a big girl.

I can handle it.

My name (or pseudonym as is the case) is The SpaNGler.

I have a competitive streak.

I was in denial.

But now... 

I am free because I do believe: 

 "The truth will set you free"

(unless of course you are guilty of a crime punishable by imprisonment and are found so... :P )

So with that I do believe that I am now over it - purged of the dilemma, cathartically cleansed via the typed word - and in acceptance (even if it is still with a shadow of reluctance) of the fact that I am a competitive person (but hopefully minus all those horrible synonyms).

So, do you have a personality trait or even perhaps a realisation about yourself that was many years in the making?

Enlighten me... I'd love to hear from you!

xo

P.S. FatMumSlims Photo update.

DAY 16 (catch up): What I'm reading

The books on my bedside table, 

"FreeStyle Handmade Bags & Skirts" - because you know I love to sew and sewing books do it for me!

"Gran's Kitchen"  - because I love cooking, particularly good old fashioned country style home cooking.

"Nine Dragons" - because I'm ever so slightly addicted to Michael Connelly novels.

"The Power of Now" - because I think we all need to be reminded from time to time that all we have is this very moment right now.

What are you reading at the moment?

DAY 17: Snack

What do you think of when you see this:

I think of childhood parties and happy, carefree times... Fairy bread - it's a food group all of it's own ♥

P.P.S. Can you tell I also like to talk from the amount I like to type? No new realisations there... I've known for since forever that I love to talk... too much... 

just ask my hubs... I'm sure it falls into one of those categories of 'cute when I met you... but now after 11 years?'

Instagram: my quasi-new obsession

Okay, no sewing projects... well, no completed ones anyway... to show you all - but there's a couple that are almost there! 

I know, I know... it seems I'm just stringing you all (well, that's if there's anyone out there reading) along...

Hmm... does it irritate you that I totally abuse, misuse and thoroughly overuse ellipses to the point of ridiculousness?

Do you have a favourite grammatical word or punctuation mark that you love to use... both appropriately and inappropriately (and we're just talking typing here people!)...or are you, God-forbid, an unabashedly proud member of the grammar police? (I'd have probably lost you long ago, I'm thinking if you were... maybe?)

Anyhoo...

Onto Instagram, my new love... have I ever told you that I think I have a slightly obsessive, addictive trait? I find something new... a hobby, a website, gadget, a recipe - whatever... and it's my new in-thing till something newer, better, faster, or tastier takes my fancy... lucky my scope is fairly tame and lightly fanciful in this regard (does that even make sense? It does to me so I hope you get me... basically I am a creature of habit and loyalty with regard to the serious, heavy things in life but not so with the inconsequential...*sigh*...like Instagram)

Loving taking snaps and, if you've been reading along, taking part in FatMumSlims May photo challenge... 

So here's the last three days:

Day 13: Mothers day with the very appropriate trigger word - Mum...

Here's a snap of my gorgeous Mum... 

Day 14: Grass... of the lawn variety

So, here's a little patch of my back yard... along with a dandelion that was feeling a little like I was yesterday - all wished out!

And today, day 15: Love

My engagement, wedding and eternity rings.

♥An engagement band in anticipation of a future together...

♥A wedding band to promise to create just that...

♥An eternity ring for the birth of each of our daughters - the continuation of our future

By the way, and just because it feels right to say... Love is hard work in the real world - I don't think it's meant to be easy, even if I wish it were at times... I don't speak much of my husband on here - not for too many reasons other than I guess that this is MY little space, my time out from the real world - one of kiddie tantrums, grown up tantrums, bills to pay, dishes to wash, laundry, laundry and more laundry... and okay, lots of laughing, baking and finger painting too - I'm just a little private I guess with the super personal stuff and the hubs is even more private and basically I'm just not one to air dirty laundry... or super, sparkly, blind yourself bleachy clean laundry for that matter... oh, and there is also that thing with irrevocable and forever there internet reach... but just so you know - he exists, he's very special, he's a fantastical hand's on dad, he's very much a part of my everyday and I do love him hugely (even though and despite how he tells me I now have my life's quota of bling)!

Now back to my love of the moment - Instagram...

There's just one thing that Instagram has caused me to ponder, and that is why has my actual camera - you know that thing that's a bit bigger, and clunkier, and is purely designed for one thing only... taking photo's - become so redundant... It is presently my most expensive dust collector around here... often it seems my phone is able to produce nicer, sharper and more pleasing photo's; not to mention much easier to edit and play around with... the jury is out on whether I'm glad for this fact or not... 

Or maybe I just need a fancier (aka more expensive) camera? Oohhh, I can dream about it at least!

Okay, I think I've rambled, gibbered and scattered my thoughts about here enough for tonight... it's time I got some sewing projects done!

xo

Life by instagram

Photo a day in May catchup....

Day 9: 

Something you do everyday

Hmm.... time for a new toothbrush I think... strange how showing off a photo of my own toothbrush feels a little personal... was it too much too soon? LOL!

Day 10:

A favourite word

Into the looking glass to see a favourite word or four... oh and I really should have added the word "Escapade"  because who doesn't love a little bit of an escapade to brighten and lighten your day?

Day 11: 

Kitchen

How about a kiss, ginger... this was the going's on and creation from my kitchen on this day... yummo ginger kisses!

Happiness = always my munchkins; sometimes the silence at night; strangely, apple trees - laden with fruit, totally bare or covered in blossoms

And so with that we are up to date...

Wishing all the mum's out there a fabulous and special day tomorrow surrounded by love for mothers day.

xxoo

Oh and if you're inclined, why not follow me on instagram... you'll see a bit more of my everyday amongst other things... like this shot of my two pegs on my clothesline - RIVETING!

or a baked or prettied delight that does not grace the blog

 - and you know I'd love the company!

Check me out - there's a tab to the right or just search for:

the_spangler

☺

You... oh wait, that means me...

Day 6 of the Photo a Day challenge being delivered by FatMumSlim.

Topic of the day:
You

...and so here is a couple of photo's of me snapped in the past week:

I've been playing with Instagram (which by the way is the primary forum on which I'm taking part in FMS's photo challenge... why not check out and follow along - there's an instagram link on my right sidebar) and exploring the different free apps available for special effects and filters... It really is quite amazing what can be done these days with a photo and how a bad pic can be made better or even be promoted from the trash-can delete button to the public worthy share option!

All fun, time eaters and distractions from real life I'm sure...

Anyhoo... I'm beginning to worry that I'm transitioning from being a quite private, veritable self-portrait and photo recluse to an out and out, in your face, every post will have a highly edited, moody, (and um... er... try-hardish) self portrait... 

I hereby promise and declare I will not continue to assault your eyes with an overload of self portraits in every post and I will instead try to focus on prepping and putting together a 'knock-your-socks-off-awesome' refashioned clothing tute!

Oooh and just because if it's possible to fall just a little in love with a piece of cookware... 

check out this gorgeous retro, cranberry Corning Visions double boiler... I believe the base saucepan is not the original to the double boiler insert - I may be mistaken - because the saucepan is a teflon coated non-stick one that I think was sold separately and the double boiler base only had small handles... but hey, this was my garage sale find of the weekend...

Can you believe it was only $5? I love the cranberry. I love that it's glass. I don't know if I can bring myself to use it or if it will merely join my slowly growing retro kitchen display collection (actually, compliments of google I've just read of the possible - though low - risk of glass stoveware exploding or shattering and I think that this is a sign that this pretty pot deserves to be on display only). 

Either way, this  purple, cranberry pot set makes me smile!

☺

Shake your tail feather... it's day 5

Day 5 of FatMumSlim's photo a day challenge with the topic, Birds.

Here's my friend down at the local fauna park... she's (I'm just assuming she is a she???) rather friendly and curious... and manages to scare the bah-jeezus out of Big Little Miss M every time we go wandering the park (which is pretty much a weekly event).

I feel for her (BL Miss M) cause I guess my feathered friend here is kinda tall and leggy and somewhat towering when your only knee high to a grasshopper! 

Plus, those curious, amber eyes and the low guttural noise along with the strange 'ticking' sound they make could be the stuff of nightmares for a rather emotional four year old.

We do love the fauna park though and emu-phobe or not, it remains one of my girls most favourite places to visit.

Wishing you all a wonderful weekend... 

One day I will actually sew and/or refashion something and do a tutorial again... I just can't seem to find my creative mojo or the hours in the day to hunt it down at the minute!

Baking seems to be dominating at the moment, which is okay for me because I find it somewhat therapeutic and calming... though in the midst of the kitchen chaos I'm sure it doesn't look that way!

Anyhow... I'm just rambling now (or was I all along?)...

xo 

Another day another photo.... Day 3

MAY 3 - Something I wore today...

Some lippy - a true rare occasion since motherhood.

My necklace, I wear it every day. It was a gift from my mother for my 21st birthday.

A wonderfully snuggly and warm, cowl neck knit... perfect for the cooler weather here today.

DAY 3 - Photo a Day in May

Well, this is an extreme rarity... three posts in one day! This is short and sweet however as I continue my FatMumSlim photo a day project.

Theme of the day for day 2: Skyline 

So, here is tonight's country skyline from the outskirts of my town... 

Who doesn't love a sunset? I'm not totally thrilled (far from really) with my photo. I wanted to catch more colours but the best laid plans are made to go awry and I just couldn't get my girls all organised in time to catch the best bit of the sunset but nonetheless I'm glad I captured a little colour... five minutes later and the sky was pitch black.

Head on over to my sidebar there and click to follow my instagram if you like and be sure to let me know with a comment so I can follow back :)

xo

How about a little sugar, sugar?

Sugar - you evil but oh, so sweet fiend!

It's a love/hate relationship.

I'm not sure what to call these cupcakes... I'm thinking they are the lazy ladies cupcake. I truly was lazy in the creation, preparation and baking of this sweet, shhhaha-weeeeet, creation.

Seriously, it was MEGA sweet. Don't like sugar? Diabetic? Health food freak? Close the lappy, shut down the screen, back away from the computer because these cupcakes will bring you no joy!

Okay, maybe just a little... especially for cutesy finished factor.

Here's a peek at the heinous ingredients:

I had heard about pink lemonade cupcakes but had not heard of the main feature ingredient in the recipe, lemonade concentrate. Lemonade concentrate? It read like it was a liquid because many recipes stated that it was to be used frozen... but my brain imagines it as a powder like 'Tang'... I don't believe I have ever seen lemonade concentrate here in Aussie-land. Feel free to leave a comment at the end of my post and enlighten me. 

Please? 

Can I get it anywhere in Australia?

Well the recipe pretty much goes like this (and please bear in mind lazy = very generalised and loosely thrown together instructions)

Place your box mix, instant custard pudding powder and half the packet of jelly crystals into your mixer bowl and stir to mix.

Add 2 lightly beaten eggs, a drop or two of pink food colour (totally optional as the jelly crystals will provide some colour), then add in a cup and a half of the creamy soda (or whatever flavour soda you choose to use... I might try a purple grape soda version next time after a convo with my SIL)

Blend in your mixer on medium speed for about 2 minutes, scraping down the sides to ensure all ingredients are evenly combined.

Divide into patty pans or cups and bake in a moderate oven for approx 16 minutes.

Check out these super cute waxed patty cups:

My girls and I like pretty, pink things... so the pink cupcakes then got prettied up a little, and went from this:

To this: 

The icing again was a lazy lady recipe... you might have noticed my box mix came with a sachet of ready made frosting... well, I simply whipped it up some more in the mix master, added a little extra icing sugar and some fresh cream together with the remaining sugar crystals and whipped until the crystals had all dissolved and the frosting was light and smooth.

Then my girls and I got busy with a piping bag.

Ah, love. Now, I'll be honest and tell you that I'm not someone who really is a fan of packet or box mixes - whether it be for sweet cakes, breads, desserts, sauces, meals or whatever - I am so normally, totally a 'from-scratch' girl. This sugar abomination however was a nice and brief departure from my usual cooking ways. Whip some up - they couldn't be easier, or more loaded with all things sweet... well, actually, I had thought to sprinkle these cute delights with some rose coloured sugar crystals I had left from another baking escapade but I was already starting to freak about how much sugar was already in these babies!

So, there you have it. 

Cheers xo

May Photo Challenge...

FatMumSlim is running a fabulous photo challenge.

I like the idea, I'm a little hooked on Instagram, I need some motivation to get posting more consistently and it will be nice to take a few minutes out of everyday to just ponder and reflect.

This should be fun... let me know if you're taking part so I can check out your posts, instagram, tweets, or FB... Follow me on Instagram and see my May photo's plus some random and everyday pics too!

Staying true to annoying form I'm playing catch up with the challenge already!

Here's my Day 1 Theme: Peace
(Day 2 coming up soon)

http://instagr.am/p/KHcyGeBynL/

xxx

Tweaking and rejuvenating!

Well, what do you think?

I've tweaked the layout and decided to rejuvenate the blog layout a little...

I think this new layout is a little less cluttered now to set about cleaning up and neatening my side bar...

And then I'll be back with a bit of a follow along on my latest project -I've fallen in LOVE with Japanese pattern books!!!



xo

You've heard it all before.

 I've promised to try to be here more. Give you more posts. More free tutorials. More of me....

I haven't delivered and up till right now to be honest it has been a little bit of a source of stress. I keep just popping by, checking out the stats, seeing what's still of interest and wishing I had more to give, more time and just a bit more of everything really....

*Insert random photo (because photo's make me happy, they make blog posts look pretty and really, this whole big, wide world truly is beautiful! This is a SOOC - a phone camera too, mind you - shot of the beach where the family and I have just returned from holidaying... is it not BEAUTIFUL!)

But here's the thing, I don't want to be stressed about something I actually love doing - creating, sewing, delivering tutes and telling you about my day to day. Today I think I realised that what is stressing me is not any stress created by not blogging but perhaps the stress of not having an outlet... you see it's really quite cathartic and self-satisfying to get on here and just type and share. I love that so many of you have popped by my little blog and had a read, left a comment and even used a tute or two.

I'm de-stressing and it feels good. I want to really thank each and every reader who stops by here... it's nice to feel like I'm actually typing/talking/sharing with more than just myself.... maybe I've been gone and sporadic of late for too long to actually have many of you still popping by... maybe I am now just rambling to myself... still cathartic though! But for those that are here, popping by, I really do appreciate it... I know I will get out of this blogging funk one way or another... there's a whole lot of ideas upstairs that are busting to get on the screen... but in the meantime I thought I'd give a quick recap on my past top 3 posts - all tutorials, so I guess without asking it's safe to assume that's what a lot of you want to see more of.... (wish me creativity and time and I will produce!!!! ☺) 

The number one post to date, with close to 12,000 views - I know, small fish in the big scale of this massive blog-o-sphere but BIG FISH to me and my little ditty amongst it plus this little fact also for some silly reason gives me... BIG SMILES ☺☺☺.

THE 50c THRIFTY REFASHION

A very close second is:

A TIERED RUFFLE REFASHION

and coming in third from back in December 2010

THE DOUBLE LAYER TWIRLY SKIRT

And you know what? I just looked to the right sidebar and see that, yep, I have previously put a widget on there that actually already lists the most popular 10 posts from my blog... hmmm... I always discover these kind of things afterwards! So there you go! Check out the other seven too!

I'd love to know what brought you by here today... enlighten me, if you will... let me know about your blog so I can stop by and say hi... follow my blog if you like and let me know... check out my Pinterest boards... tell me about yours... What do you do to get out of a blogging rut?

Putting a call out for some virtual interaction of the bloggy, friendly, crafty sort!

☺